|
Anger
Management: What Triggers Your
Anger?
In order to
develop good anger management techniques, you must first
understand what provokes anger, and the body’s natural response
to anger. Anger is precipitated by the body’s natural chemical
responses to increased physical arousal, emotions, and
accompanying behaviors, that result when a person feels
threatened, or perceives a threat or loss. The threat does not
necessarily have to be a threat of personal, physical harm. It
can be a threat to their self-esteem, when they believe their
feelings are challenged or discounted by another.
The body naturally responds to
any perceived threat by producing adrenalin to prepare for
"fight or flight." How a particular person responds to these
threats is due, in large, to how they have been conditioned as
a child or learned later in life, whether with good anger
management techniques or negative ones. Many abuse victims are
conditioned to respond violently, and learn verbal, mental, or
physically abusive behaviors from others, and never develop
positive anger management techniques. Every person alive has
triggers that set off their
anger.
Here are the
most common reasons people become angry:
- Threats or
perceived threats to their body or
property
- A threat
to their values (disagreeing with something someone is
doing, such as kicking a dog, or not following the
rules)
- When
someone insists they do something they don't want to
do
- When
someone hurts or betrays them, and they feel a loss of
trust
- When they
attempt to escape guilty feelings over something they do
not want to feel or admit to
themselves
- When they
believe their feelings are discounted, and their sense of
self esteem is compromised
- When
expectations are not met (realistic, or unrealistic
expectations) and they don't get their
way
Recognizing
what provokes your anger, or what pushes your buttons, is the
first step toward implementing good anger management
techniques. Instead of exploding, or reacting badly, try to
recognize the signs that you are getting angry, such
as:
• Heart
Pounding
• Sweating, especially sweaty
palms
• Tunnel vision
• Fist or jaw
clenching
• Buzzing sound in your
ears
• Headache or
dizziness
When you are
able to recognize the symptoms of your anger when they begin,
you are much more likely to walk away. Once the initial
adrenaline rush of anger passes, you are much more likely to
react with proactive, good anger management techniques, such as
discussion, or simply distancing yourself from the people or
events you know will provoke your anger.
|